It’s like the guy upstairs knows and is just looking for a laugh but it seems like every time I gotta poop a call comes in. The chances are literally 80-90%. A partner of mine used to  have the same happen except like clockwork, whenever his head touches the pillow, a call comes in. I don’t really know why it is but I wish it would stop. All I need is like 5 minutes. Seriously. I need 5 minutes. Is that too much to ask?

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Stay safe.